In The Shadow of the Almighty

Oh God, that you might be the light, and I just be in your shadow.

So much of my life, I have tried climbing my own way out of a pit; fought, clawed, thought just being “good” would bring me any number of desired responses.

But God, you showed me, all my righteousness is like filthy rags. I have not one ounce of my own righteousness, it’s only you I want.

I used to see those on the grandstands play, parade and make much of their name, saying they hope to bring you fame….

But I don’t want my own praise now. I don’t long to be seen or heard, to be known or to have my face plastered anywhere….

I need you to be the center. The sole one who receives fame, the audience alone for anything you have ever called me to do.

I used to lie to myself. Rise and say it was for you. But every man knows the echo of their own heart.

And now I know I need nothing, want nothing, seek nothing but your praises and glory and friendship alone.

I need not brass towers or wise influence, or others to look upon me and call me blessed. I just need your promise of the whisper I’ll hear when I take my last breath, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

I need to sense your presence near, hear your voice as your Living Word vibrates through my being, in a way only You can speak.

I need the quiet, more than the loud; the invisible purpose and praise, your approval alone, only now.

The others they have come to mean nothing.

I need your hand to hold me steady, guide me carefully, lead me through the shadow of the valley of the shadow of death….

Your safety, covering me when I am weak.

I need you to hem me in, before, behind, on each side of me, so I won’t lean too much too the right, or bend too far to the left.

I used to long for great faith. But Lord, I know it is you who places every seed in every vessel. It is your plans I now long alone will reign. I except your portion of faith.

And if you use me, I am willing. If you don’t, in the way I expected, that is fine too.

My purpose and prize and worth isn’t found in any earthly reward or possession….it’s in you seeing my faithfulness, watching the faith that you gave me long before I was born, move into action.

You know my name. The God of the Universe knows MY name. You call me forth. What an awesome thing…

I have no strength, apart from you.

It is your face I seek, not your hands that give me gifts that might bless me….but your eyes that peirce with holy love that first and foremost motivates me.

I am yours. And whether I live a thousand more years, or die this instant, I am satisfied because the One who made me lives within my being.

You whisper, and lead, you guide and you heal. All I have ever wanted or needed was in You.

I surrender now, even more, to your ways. And though I am a woman who has seen both dark and light, tasted bitterness, and felt euphoric light….

I welcome whatever you bring.

I give my life and accept your grace, and choose to walk in obedience solely to your ways. 

I am yours, Lord. Yours to mold and bend and stretch and call as you like, Jesus. No other name…

There is no power under heaven, except in your name. Your name alone….Jesus.

The Lion and Lamb, the One who will ride from heaven and declare His victory. I am yours. And this shadow, my filthy rags, my fleeting spoil….I tuck away, even more….

Wrapping it daily, completely in your grace.

So that you alone get all glory, I become seen less. Invisible. Worthless to my own ways.

Giving my life more to the One who is holy; deserving of adoration and glory. You are my light.

I am just in your shadow; longing to disappear, be made nothing, so the whole world can see you….

See you, and call on you, know your power and goodness. That you alone might be famous, famous on this stage of life.

You alone are King.

So, I hide. Hide even more unseen…in the shadow of your love.

“I have put My words in your mouth and have covered you with the shadow of My hand, to establish the heavens, to found the earth, and to say to Zion, ‘You are My people.” ~ Isaiah 51:16

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High Will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.” ~ Psalms 91:1