At twenty-two, I too often missed his eyes. I was busy trying to make bottles at the exact right temperature. Trying to worry about whether he would keep quiet as I raced through the grocery store.
At twenty-two, I didn’t know what was in my own eyes…how could I really stop to look into, someone else’s?
But, little did I know…there was a story in his yes.
Twenty-five, I see her dark eyes, and notice her smile. I get distracted by her clothes, her hair band, her matching bib and shoes that always needed to be “just right”. I try to decorate her room…and get it like the magazines I thumbed through.
I thought…looking just right…was all that mattered. I was young, what little did I know then?
I have a toddler too….still seeking me to pick him up. Now both ask of me, demand of me, plead with me…to look into their eyes.
Still, little did I know….there was a story in their eyes.
I start teaching. Getting paid to stop, gaze, peer into the little children’s faces. They are sweet, cute, adorable…engaging. But there is twenty of them.
I want to stop, talk to, learn about the unique characteristics in each of them. But there just isn’t enough time….there isn’t enough me.
I need to prepare lessons, make play-dough, get the room ready for the next class of children. There are just too many needs. Plus, I have my own children, back at home.
But, little did I know….there was a story in their eyes.
I start homeschooling. Slow my life down. We start fostering, and I have time to sit for hours on the ground…asking questions, listening to their stories, hearing their dreams, and seeing who each little person really is.
Child number three comes. She has extra needs. In fostering her, it requires me to…look within her eyes.
In her, I am seeing a whole new world….In her, I see a story in her eyes. A story in mine too.
Sunday School…I am learning more. I see the kids, my own kids among them. And realize my call is to share with them the joy of Jesus. But how can we share Jesus, if the children we look at, are just faces in chairs, inanimate objects, mechanical images we see.
I stop, get down, hear their interpretation of the story of Jonah running.
I am learning….as I realize…there is a story in their eyes.
One child comes, then another, then another into my home, through fostering. I start looking outward, seeing the needs in the world. Slowly I am stretching out of my inward focus, to see the story in their eyes.
My world expands, my heart grows by leaps and bounds. I want to know more, see more, do more, help more….these children with stories in their eyes.
But I know, even now, even as I sit on this computer looking out at me….black words dark crossing the screen…
A child sits at my feet. She tugs at me, talks to me, shows me her fluffy friends and asks of me…to look within her eyes.
So, I must go. Stop this eye-less peering world that we live in. Do my part. Do my part in UNITING this universe we live in.
Walking away from this screen that sits lifeless in front of me. The one that has no story. This screen that is just man-made degradable plastic technology….in front of me….
I want to live from now on…Really stopping, looking, seeing who is around me.
For I know as she begs of me…just a little more time. I will be grateful, I am always grateful….
Each time I stop, look….and see….the story in their eyes.
(Linking with Emily, Tracy)
10 Comments
Jen, you are truly beautiful. Bless you for your heart. “I want to know more, see more, do more, help more….these children with stories in their eyes.” I want this too and your words have really spoken to me today. And I think it was mainly what you shared at the end. There are too many times I know I don’t walk away from the computer screen when I should. Even with grown children they still want and need us to see them. I also realized it’s time I explore your place here further. I’m rather tardy with clicking some of your links. Thank you, as always, for hosting us here. You are a blessing.
Beth – Oh this computer that lures us as writers…when children tug, dinner calls, laundry laughs at us, and a world wants us for itself. Glad you could relate, feel the pulling that I feel at times. Thanks for looking around, you present at UNITE is a gift!
This was really lovely. Yes, I was reminded of that phrase that the eyes are *windows into the soul*. So true. Unfortunately, we don’t often take enough time to search them.
Stories are waiting to be read in every pair of eyes we meet. May we be on the look-out!
GOD BLESS!
Sharon – Oh the library we could fill if we read all the stories in the eyes of those around us. Such a great point Sharon!
When people talk, I am a mouth watcher. I can’t hear a word you’re saying if I look into your eyes – but when they were little, I did look into their eyes – deeply, savoring. Its these teen eyes – and the story they tell me now – how they see our story differently – and I don’t see the same love – but how they look at me and don’t see that love. That’s the hard part right now – their stories being so different from how I remember them.
Bluecotton – I am sorry you are hurting friend. Praying for clarity, understanding, truth, and Love to be the cornerstone of all your relationships today friend! {{hug}}
Dear Jen
Oh, I know that intense longing ti give what we don’t have! But I don’t think that is the point even though we desire to love way and beyond our ability; I think when we allow Jesus to love everyone we come in contact with everyday and minister to them the way only He knows, we really know how to love! What a sweet post, my friend.
Blessings XX
Mia
Mia – Your comment makes a great point…we can’t give away what we don’t have. Ever more why we need to come to the feet of Jesus to fill us…daily, hour by hour, moment by moment.
Hi Jen! Your post reminds me of a study in the Seasons of Life. In and out we go, never feeling like we have enough time…kind of like trying to grab a tiger’s tail.
With age comes the wisdom, and so now you are aware, but you know, I am sure you were then too. Who remembers, with all the ‘stuff’ there was to do? I know you looked into those eyes. All the eyes, your children and the foster kids too. We did the same ministry, and I can understand the pace.
Thank you for the reminder that we all have a story. In our eyes, our hands and our ears too.
Ceil
Ceil – I just love your heart! That is so neat that your family also fostered. I would love to hear more about what God showed you, taught you, took you through on that journey! And oh how I hear ya too…business being like trying to catch a tigers tail! What a great and very accurate word picture that gives!!